#ReadyforParenthood Campaign

Bonding with your new baby takes time. Your baby can hear from around 24 weeks of pregnancy so you can start talking to them before they are born. When your baby is born, you can start to get to know them by having skin-to-skin contact.

Even if they have to stay in hospital you can spend time bonding with them and be part of their care until they are ready to come home.

Holding your baby, making eye contact, smiling and talking to them when you’re together or out and about helps them to feel secure and connected. You may not feel an immediate bond with your baby, but taking time to get to know them will build your relationship.

If you are feeling that life as a new parent is difficult, you can talk with friends and family, your midwife, the maternal mental health team or your health visitor for support.

Useful links:

• Pregnancy: Tips, advice and ideas – BBC Tiny Happy People
• Five ways to wellbeing in pregnancy – Tommy’s
• My Prem Baby (app to support parents of premature babies) – Tommy’s
• Building a Happy Baby – Unicef
• Babies cry, you can cope – ICON
• Tips for bonding with your premature baby in hospital – BBC Tiny Happy People
• Tips for playing with your baby – Start4Life
• Tips about fatherhood – Dad Blog UK
• An essential guide for new dads – DadPad
• Pregnancy and parenting app – Baby Buddy
• Mental health support – Mind
• Perinatal mental illness peer support – PANDAS Foundation
• Making sense of your baby – Institute of Health Visiting

Covid-19, Influenza vaccinations and Whooping cough are recommended in pregnancy to protect you and your baby from serious illness. Ask your midwife, GP or an immunisation nurse for more information.

You can have the Covid-19 vaccine if you are breastfeeding and getting both jabs offers the best protection. Vaccinated people are far less likely to become seriously ill.

Childhood vaccinations are offered free of charge by your GP. As well as protecting your own baby, you’re also protecting other babies and children by preventing the spread of disease.

Useful links:

• Covid vaccination decision aid – RCOG
• Covid vaccines, pregnancy and breastfeeding – RCOG
• Covid-19 vaccination easy read guidance – gov.uk
• Covid vaccines, pregnancy and breastfeeding – NHS.uk
• Unvaccinated mums urge pregnant women to get jabbed – gov.uk

The environments we provide our children help shape their experiences. Try to make eating well and taking regular exercise a priority and it will help promote healthy behaviours to your children.

Exercise increases energy levels and helps you feel good. It doesn’t have to mean joining a gym. Pushing the pram or buggy to the shops or in a park is a good way to get active. Some parks even have free green gyms you can use.

Build activity into your everyday. You can use the stairs rather than the lift, walk places instead of driving, walk briskly with your buggy, rather than slowly. You will soon start to feel the benefits.

You may find less time for shopping so preparing healthy meals in advance will help keep your energy up whilst you look after your child. You can prepare meals in bulk and freeze them.

Regular physical activity is great for our bodies and minds. Slower paced activities such as walking are good opportunities to connect with others. Make time to connect with family and friends, in a safe way and take notice of the world around you.

We have a comprehensive guide and introduction to healthy eating and weight including local weight management services.

• Healthier Families – NHS
• The Eat Well Guide – NHS
• Guidelines on physical activity – WHO
• Keep fit and healthy with a baby – NHS
• Live well – NHS
• Pregnancy and postnatal: being active – e-LfH
• Squeezy pelvic floor app

Breastfeeding is good news for mums as well as babies. It lowers the risk of breast cancer, osteoporosis and obesity. It naturally uses up around 500 calories a day. And it saves money – formula feeding can cost as much as £45 a month.

In the first few days after birth, breasts produce a golden yellow fluid called colostrum. It’s the perfect combination of vitamins and nutrition for your baby, and much easier to digest than first infant formula.

If you need help or support with breastfeeding, visit our feeding page, ask your midwife or health visitor, or get in touch with your local breastfeeding support group.

If your baby is around six months and staying in a sitting position with steady head and is co-ordinating their eyes, hands and mouth, it may be time to introduce solids. It’s important not to rush the process too quickly. 

• Off to the best start – UNICEF
• Breastfeeding help and support – NHS
• Benefits of breastfeeding – NHS
• National Breastfeeding Helpline
• The Breastfeeding Network
• Breastfeeding support – La Leche League
• Twins Trust
• Donating breastmilk – UKAMB
• Infant formula – UNICEF
• Infant milks – First Steps for Nutrition Trust
• How to bottle feed – NHS
• Introducing solid foods – UNICEF

The safest way for your baby to sleep is lying on their back on a firm, flat mattress in a cot, crib or moses basket. Babies whose heads are covered by bedding have a higher risk of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS). To stop them wriggling down, put them in the cot with their feet at the bottom end and tuck the blanket in under their arms. 

Avoid overheating which can cause Sudden Infant Death Syndrome(SIDS). Babies can overheat with too much bedding or clothing, or if the room’s too hot. The ideal room temperature is 16-20°C. Use one or more layers of lightweight blankets; a folded blanket counts as two blankets.

Your baby should sleep in the same room as you, day and night, for at least the first six months so you can respond quickly if they need you.

Around 86% of Sudden Infant Deaths (SIDS) happen when a baby is six months old or less. To reduce the risk for your baby, seek advice from your health visitor and follow the safer sleep advice from the Lullaby Trust.

Don’t worry if they turn onto their tummy or side to sleep once they are old enough to roll over.

Some parents choose to share a bed with their baby. It is important to know how to do this safely.

It’s not recommended to co-sleep with your baby if either you or your partner smokes (even if you do not smoke in the bedroom) or have drunk alcohol or taken drugs (including medications that may make you feel sleepy).

Seek professional advice and follow the safer sleep advice from the Lullaby Trust.

To reduce the chance of sudden infant death syndrome (SIDS), it’s important that you don’t accidentally fall asleep with your baby on a sofa or armchair. Put your baby in a safe place to sleep if you think this may happen.

If you worry you might fall asleep breastfeeding in bed, prepare your bed as a safe sleeping area for your baby by following the recommendations for co-sleeping. 

For more information on safe sleeping please visit:

Safe sleeping :: Frimley HealthierTogether (frimley-healthiertogether.nhs.uk)

Safer sleeping (frimleyhealthandcare.org.uk)

Babies must always travel in a car seat for their safety. Young or premature babies may have breathing problems if they travel in the car seat for too long. You may need to stop for regular breaks so they can stretch.

It’s okay for your baby to fall asleep in a car seat when travelling, but they should be taken out as soon as you get to your destination, and placed onto a firm, flat surface, such as a cot, crib or moses basket, to sleep. 

All babies cry, and some cry more than others. Crying is your baby’s way of telling you they need comfort and care.

Think ICON: ‘I’ is for Infant crying is normal. Every baby is different but after about 2-3 months they should start to cry less each week.

‘C’ is for Comforting methods can help soothe your baby. Try skin to skin cuddles, breastfeeding, singing to your baby or going for a walk together.

‘O’ is for OK to walk away if you’ve checked your baby’s safe and the crying’s upsetting you. After a few minutes when you’re feeling calmer, go back to them.

‘N’ is for Never, ever shake, hurt or shout at your baby. Shaking can cause lasting brain damage or death.

If you’re worried that your baby’s unwell visit our pages below for advice.

Baby under 3 months 

Useful links:

• Soothing a crying baby – NHS
• Babies cry you can cope – ICON
• Support for crying and sleepless babies – Cry-sis
• Support guide for new dads – DadPad

Having a baby is a big life event and it’s natural to experience a range of emotions. If you’re feeling low or depressed, speak to your family, friends, midwife, health visitor or GP. Make time for yourself and keep doing the things you enjoy.

If you think your partner has postnatal depression, encourage them to get the help and treatment they need. You can help by sharing the load – caring for your baby, as well as doing practical things like household tasks. It’s common for partners to get anxious or depressed too, so seek help if you feel low.

Useful links below:

• Mental Health for mums and dads
• Mental health, before during and after pregnancy – Tommy’s
• Pregnancy and post-birth wellbeing plan – Tommy’s
• Perinatal and postnatal mental health – Mind
• Coping with stress after having a baby – NHS
• Antenatal and postnatal mental health – NICE
• Postnatal depression – NHS
• PND awareness and support – PaNDAS Foundation
• Postnatal depression in dads – NCT
• Postnatal depression in men – Tommy’s
• Postnatal depression – Royal College of Psychiatrists

Becoming a parent often puts a strain on relationships. Make time for each other when you can. Do little things to make each other feel cared for and included.

Talk to someone if you need help or support. There are lots of ways you can contact a relationship counsellor and some of them are free.

Domestic conflict and abuse may get worse after the birth. Seek help and call 999 if you’re in immediate danger.

Local domestic violence support can be found here. YOU ARE NEVER ALONE. 

Domestic Abuse :: Frimley HealthierTogether (frimley-healthiertogether.nhs.uk)

Useful links:

• Relationships after having a baby – NHS
• Changes to your relationships after having a baby – NCT
• Relationship support – Relate
• National Domestic Abuse Helpline – Refuge
• I need help – Women’s Aid
• Domestic abuse and how to get help – Gov.uk
• Help for domestic violence perpetrators – Respect
• Find your nearest Sexual Assault Referral Centre – NHS

You can get pregnant as little as three weeks after the birth of a baby, even if you’re breastfeeding and your periods haven’t started again.

Unless you want to get pregnant again, it’s important to use some kind of contraception every time you have sex after giving birth, including the first time

Visit our Contraception Page for more help. 

Contraception :: Frimley HealthierTogether (frimley-healthiertogether.nhs.uk)

Useful resources:

• Contraception Choices – UCL
• Planning your pregnancy – NHS
• Planning another pregnancy – NHS
• Contraception after having a baby – NHS
• Fertility and contraception after birth – NCT
• Find family planning services – NHS
• Sexwise.org.uk – FPA

You’ll bleed from your vagina after the birth. It’ll be heavy at first, and you’ll need super-absorbent sanitary towels. If you’ve had stitches, keep them clean and dry and tell your midwife, health visitor or GP if you’re worried about them.

After having a baby, it’s quite common to leak a bit of pee if you laugh, cough or move suddenly. Pelvic floor exercises can help with this. If you have pelvic pain or are leaking pee, ask for a referral for physiotherapy to help.

• Support with Pelvic Girdle Pain – Pelvic Partnership
• Pelvic floor exercises in pregnancy – NCT
• Pelvic pain in pregnancy – NHS
• Squeezy app
• Pelvic health wellbeing – London Maternity Clinical Network
• Pelvic Obstetric & Gynaecological Physiotherapy (POGP)
• Patient leaflets – Royal College of Obstetrics & Gynaecology (RCOG)
• Pelvic floor exercises – Health & Care Video Library
• Female pelvic floor 3D animation – Continence Foundation of Australia
• What are pelvic floor exercises? – NHS
• Advice and guidance for exercise in child-bearing years – POGP

Smoking can still damage your baby’s health after they are born. Secondhand smoke can increase the chance of Sudden Infant Death Syndrome (SIDS) and your baby’s more likely to be admitted to hospital with lung problems or infections in their first year.

It can be hard to stop smoking, but it is never too late to try. Visit your local stop smoking service.

Useful links:

• Breastfeeding and smoking – NHS
• Passive smoking – NHS
• Smoking, vaping, cannabis and breastfeeding – La Leche League GB
• Smoking during pregnancy or after birth – The Lullaby Trust
• Quit smoking, Better Health – NHS
• Alcohol and breastfeeding – La Leche League GB
• Breastfeeding and drinking alcohol – NHS
• Drugs in breastmilk – is it safe? – The Breastfeeding Network
• Find support – Talk to FRANK
• Drug addition: getting help – NHS
• Co-sleeping with your baby – The Lullaby Trust
• Smoking fact sheet – The Lullaby Trust

Getting ready for your baby to come home can feel exciting but daunting, especially if your baby is tube feeding or on medication. The neonatal team will help you prepare and there’s lots of support available after you get home.

Before you go home, you may have the opportunity to ‘room-in’ for 1-2 days. This will give you more confidence in caring for your baby while having the support of neonatal staff if you need it. Speak to your team to find out more.

Visit:

Premature babies :: Frimley HealthierTogether (frimley-healthiertogether.nhs.uk)

For more infomation in association with Bliss.